In the 1950’s a scientist called Harlow did a series of experiments with orphaned baby monkeys. His aim was to find out about the drives and needs of the infant monkey as he thought these findings could perhaps also be understood for human infants.
He discovered that when given the choice between two doll monkey mothers, one made of wire that provided food and one made of cloth that didn’t, the baby monkey would spend 22 hrs a day a with the clothmonkey and when scared or in need of comfort the baby monkeys found security in the softness and warmth of the clothmonkey.
You can see more about this interesting, bonkers and at times really quite upsetting work here.
I feel that part of every single one of us is still inside a little baby and that our adult selves can find or create what we need to comfort us and help us feel safe and happy….
I started writing a blog after losing my much loved Daddy b…. I was sad and felt very vulnerable…. I could never have been prepared for the feelings that being without parents leaves, even as a big, grown up.
So I had decided to try to focus on what I have, what good things I can draw on and create and try to remember what brings me comfort.
That’s why the blog was called ‘Clothmonkey’…..
Recently I’ve not been so good at making time for these things…. But I did a sort of a ‘speed blog’ with the #100happydays project, taking a picture everyday of something that made me happy.
You can find my pics on my Instagram, if you like cats and flowers! :)
On some days it was genuinely really hard to think of what to snap! But in general it made me feel pretty grateful for everyday lovely things and it was interesting to see what my daily clothmonkeys are…. Flowers, plants and nature seemed to feature quite a lot.
So what are your clothmonkeys? I feel that with daily stresses and life events I often forget and need to make regular time to remember.